It’s a Pensive Pondering Puzzle

I pondered in the shadows,

I ponder in the light

Turn my head to focus &

I even think through the night

Too many fragments to gather

& interruptions as I thought

Some views were nasty.

Some behavior not right.

It's a Penisve Ponderosity

I hid my face and took a knee, disheartened by what I’d seen.

Now I choose to stand in the light,

if you players would step aside!


I Ponder My Theories

It’s tragic how time has made everything in my life a clue. But as I reflect back on my life, I can fit many life events, people, notes, and items into a massive puzzle. I have lost interest in solving the puzzle, but the piece I am going to share here makes me laugh a little. And laughter is something I need after so much thinking and many daunting views.

My grandfather (Papa) had the same handful of jokes that he told my sister and me. We laughed at them, even though many of them were not very funny. Papa was funny and fun most of the time. Every time we drove past a graveyard, Papa would ask us if we knew how many dead people were buried there. We looked at him quizzically. His response was, “All of them.” And after the first time he told the joke, we laughed sarcastically, “Ha, ha, Papa!”

Now, with visions, dreams, and revelation coming to me as I piece this universe together in my mind, I wonder if when we die, we rise to a higher plane of evolution in this multidimensional “birth canal”? If so, this would mean several things.

It’s a Pensive Pondering Puzzle:

First of all, you would need to complete your evolution journey on each level or plane of existence to move on, or you will short-change yourself and your descendants by not expanding your mind to its full potential (think of it as a gestation period). So, no shortcuts or “quitting” midway. Nature has a plan. And everybody knows it’s a terrible idea to mess with Mother Nature. It would likely land you going back where you took the shortcut and starting again from there before moving forward.

Secondly, it clearly means that many of us would have lifetimes that we don’t remember, possibly lots of family members from other lifetimes, and additional accomplishments and failures we made along our journies. While I’m not fond of the idea of losing most memories, this might explain all the lucid dreams and constant déjà vu that I experience.

Third, and most excitingly, when we are all born or reborn, we would reconnect with everybody we lost! I love the thought of that image and have imagined several versions of how it plays out.

I’m sure there is a fourth, fifth, and sixth consequence or more to this plan—things like being able to unwrite shitty history. But I got bored of thinking about it, so I went for a walk.

As I walked around the enormous Elmwood Cemetery in Charlotte, I wondered where we might have put Mother Essie, Sutton Gray, and the souls belonging to the stones overgrown by greenery with names no longer legible. And does Vinton Liddell or his family think he would get better placement when time ended due to purchasing a fancy, expensive burial marker, or did his family love him so much that they went big memorializing him?

All Good Mothers

I say all good mothers know they would divide everything they have evenly among their children. Once grown and independent, what they do is entirely up to them!

It's a pensive ponderosity puzzle by Amy Jean

It’s a Pensive Pondering Puzzle


Featured image photo by Angelo Pinheiro on Unsplash

Pondering statue photo’s and grave marker photo’s by Amy Jean

Church Photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash